011 ❖ bonus cartoon fire

🌱 something(s) from this week to hold on to 🌱

◆ “It might be time for therapy again” as an ok thought to have and be curious about, curious like I might be about why my heart races sometimes or why my shoulders are tight nearly all the times, chipping away ever-so-often at one observed thing or another and trying to remember however many years ago where I had so, so, so many more of those signals that I tried so, so, so hard to bat away with equal retaliatory energy that would always cause them to bounce right back and stronger, compared to what I try to do now, which is watch them walk by and try and notice if they stick around or if they return.

◆ Matrix bullet time aka that thing where the pharmaceuticals are hittin and I seem by some miracle to have no trouble simultaneously frying tofu for the olds and preparing buttered pasta for the youngs, remembering which spatula I used for which thing as far as anyone can tell.

◆ O (4) gently and in his put-on raspy voice saying “thank you, my darling” in response to me assisting him in hauling a greasy flecked neon orange bowling ball to the ramp, especially because lately he’s been doing the “my darling” thing less, making it even more of a joy when it pops up.

◆ this tiny book from the University of Reading Special Collections, allegedly from 1740(!!!), which depicts “the two famous giants” among who knows what else, and, for that matter, any curios that, against all odds, poke through the doom curtain of any social media platform (Bluesky in this moment) giving my poor brain a momentary opportunity to forget about “staying informed” in favor of reveling in the existence of tiny ass books.

◆ C (2), in a luxurious toddler-sized robe, nonverbally but very clearly articulating with points and grunts precisely who gets night-night hugs and in what order. Look out, world.

◆ The sludge of compacted tea dust and honey that settles at the bottom of a cup of tea, cold or hot, sludgier the more hurried I am in prep, which is often very hurried.

🦆 something that’s doing it for me this week 🦆

Sometime in the last two hours, the DuckDuckGo browser has waddled back into my life, primarily for its privacy features, but actually primarily for the animated flames that appear when I choose to nuke my browser tabs. If I’m going to be held hostage by these glowing screens, may I at least find more ways to enjoy them passively, bonus if there’s cartoon fire.